Now that the kids are back to school, our family routine has changed again and already the holidays seem as if they never happened. Is it just me or are the mornings more rushed and stressful what with trying to get the kids up and dressed, packed lunches to make and school traffic to be negotiated? And then at the end of the day,
we have the homework to tackle, tea to make, evening activities to get them to and earlier bedtimes than they’ve had over the long summer months. I’m sure that, like me, you are all finding that life is pretty hectic again as the darker evenings start to draw in. So, once you have done everything you can for the kids and for your partner/spouse, gone to work, done the shopping, cooked meals, cleaned the house and done the washing, if you’re anything like me, your time and energy may have just disappeared. But there is one very important thing that many of you may have forgotten about as you crawl into bed each night…..YOU!
What have you done for YOU today?
What time and space have you created just for YOU?
What treats have you given yourself?
What fun and pleasure have YOU had today?
One of the most powerful phrases I have come across recently is about the importance of being “Positively Selfish”. I like to imagine that each of us carries with us a big tank with a tap attached to it. You start each day off with a full tank of love and energy. Each time you do something for someone else whether it be your kids, your partner, your boss, your family or your friends, the tap is turned on and a little of that wonderful love and energy pours out of the tank. So, drop by drop, your tank starts to drain. How often do you find yourself completely mentally, physically and emotionally exhausted or ‘drained’ at the end of the day? How does that affect your mood? How does it affect the way you react to those around you? Most of us become tired, irritable and short-tempered as well as being frustrated and resentful at times. Many of us were brought up to believe that we should always put others first. However, in reality, it becomes very hard to do that if you continue to put YOU last and your tank is running on empty all the time.
Being “Positively Selfish” means that you consciously take a little time each day to spend on YOU. This can mean putting aside half an hour to spend on a hobby, go for a walk, read, meditate or whatever it is that helps you to relax and re-energise. Or, it could mean taking up an evening class, spending more time with friends, joining a club or a gym. By putting your own happiness and needs up to the top of the priority list and being “Positively Selfish”, everyone around you reaps the rewards because you are constantly topping up your tank so you will have more and more energy and love to give those around you. My 11 year old daughter frequently suggests that I take a “power nap” as she calls it because she can see when my energy is low and that my battery needs recharging and she understands that I will have much more energy to have fun with her if I take a short time to myself. You will also be teaching your children a valuable lesson by showing them how important it is to value yourself and respect your needs as well as those of others.
So, what is it that you enjoy doing? What relaxes you? What makes you happy? How can you introduce more relaxation, happiness and ‘me’ time into your day-to-day life? Whose support do you need to help you become a little more “positively selfish”?
As you plan each day, make sure that you consciously schedule in a little time for you because, after all, it is YOUR life as well.
“I would rather be a superb meteor, every atom of me in magnificent glow, than a sleepy permanent planet.
The proper function of man is to live, not to exist.”
Jack London, Author, 1876-1916